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4 Years of Service
That is one of the most common statements that is uttered when someone loses someone they loved to suicide. They feel they should have been able to see it coming. "Jack knew he could come to me about anything, so why didn't he?" Obviously because he wasn't comfortable talking about it.
If a person is really suicidal, and not just doing it to get attention, they aren't going to make it obvious that they want to commit suicide. I mean, that would basically be saying: "Hey, I want to take my own life, but I'm telling you. But don't try to stop me!" No. If a person is serious about wanting to take their own life, they will put on a brave face and act as if nothing is wrong.
They will hold it all inside, terrified that if they release any of it, someone will try to stop them, which would lead to further problems.
So, when someone you love takes their own life, don't say "I should have known," because that is added and unnecessary grief you are putting on yourself. I know it's hard to get through something like this, but you need to know it is NOT your fault that you didn't see it coming.
There are signs of one thinking about suicide, but those are more obvious, and they could also just be signs of regular depression, not someone being suicidal. If you feel something is wrong or off about the person, confront them; but don't force it.
It's far better to make it crystal clear to the person that they have you to talk to, to rely on, to run to when they need a hug. Instead of constantly looking for signs that might not even be there, just make it clear to the person that they ARE loved, that things WILL get better, and that they are NOT alone.
Perkies, can I hear some of your thoughts? (: